In her upcoming memoir 'The Woman in Me,' Spears explains what led to her public breakdown in 2007
Britney Spears is shedding light on the public breakdown she suffered in 2007. Umbrella
In the pop superstar's much-anticipated upcoming memoir The Woman in Me, she looks back on hitting a photographer's car with an umbrella after shaving her head that year and explains that grief and her custody battle were weighing heavily on her at the time.
The "Toxic" singer writes in the book that she was "out of my mind with grief" after her aunt, Sandra Bridges Covington, died of ovarian cancer in January 2007. The same year, Spears went through a legal dispute with ex-husband Kevin Federline over the custody of their children, sons Sean Preston and Jayden James, now 18 and 17, respectively.
"With my head shaved, everyone was scared of me, even my mom," writes Spears in The Woman in Me. "Flailing those weeks without my children, I lost it, over and over again. I didn’t even really know how to take care of myself."
The difficult experiences ultimately led to incidents such as shaving her head and attacking a paparazzo's car.
"I am willing to admit that in the throes of severe postpartum depression, abandonment by my husband, the torture of being separated from my two babies, the death of my adored aunt Sandra, and the constant drumbeat of pressure from paparazzi, I’d begin to think in some ways like a child," adds Spears in the memoir.
The Grammy winner was put in a court-ordered conservatorship in 2008, granting father Jamie Spears and a lawyer control over her financial and personal affairs. She writes in the book that those in charge of her life forbid her from keeping the shaved head and instructed her to focus on fitness, "go to bed early" and take various medications.
Spears pleaded with a judge in open court to end the legal arrangement in September 2021, and Jamie was suspended as her conservator. Two months later, the conservatorship was terminated.
Since then, she's looked to take control over her own journey.
“Over the past 15 years or even at the start of my career, I sat back while people spoke about me and told my story for me,” Spears told PEOPLE in a recent interview done via email for this week's exclusive cover story. “After getting out of my conservatorship, I was finally free to tell my story without consequences from the people in charge of my life.”
The Woman in Me is available for pre-order ahead of its release on Oct. 24.
Double Layer Golf Umbrella For an exclusive excerpt and interview with Britney Spears, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands everywhere Friday.