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LELO’s F1S V2 male masturbator is currently taking the sex toy scene by storm. But what exactly is this space age wank tube — and, more importantly, does it live up to the hype? Plus Size Lingerie
For too long, sex toys for men have been the overlooked, the poor cousin to the sparkling array of wonders aimed at women. Unbelievable, I know, that an industry would prioritise the pleasure of women over men.
Shocking, in fact, that for so long women have been offered newfangled ways to reach giddying new heights of self-pleasure while we men stood idly by. And so to Sweden (where else?), where the tables are turning.
Sound the equality klaxon! Swedish sex tech pioneers LELO have created quite the buzz with its vibrating sex sleeve that claims to revolutionise male me-time.
The F1S V2 tastefully invites you to abandon the faithful five-knuckle-shuffle in favour of trademark SenSonic wave technology, simulating an eager mouth and throat that pulses and undulates like a woozy belly dancer.
So, roll up, roll up, fellow penis purveyors, as we shudder and spasm through a blow-by-blow review of the most stylish sex toy on the block, and follow me into its skin-safe silicone insides...
According to LELO, the F1S V2 is 'a rare kind of penis stimulator'. To be fair, I’ve been called worse.
In the vein of the Fleshlight and the stroker, the F1S V2 is a 'vibrating, male masturbation sleeve'. A wank sleeve, then. What next? A felching hood, perhaps? Frotting mittens?
Jokes aside, LELO have created the F1S V2 to simulate oral sex, and have packed in turbocharged dual motors, patented technology and state-of-the-art materials for a sophisticated, discreet look with the energy of a jackhammer. And I am here for it.
The F1S V2 arrives ensconced in an austere, elegant and expensive-feeling black box with no frills and no fuss.
The compact, lightweight Alexa-style six-inch tube with its bevelled edges and futuristic, metallic detailing is dinky enough to throw in your carry-on bag. It also looks just like a Bluetooth speaker, so if your mum pops around you can leave it on the kitchen table without fear of awkward questions.
There’s a window on one side, so you can peer into the sci-fi innards and see the exterior of the smooth blue (or red, sports car fans!) silicone sleeve. It even lights up from within when in use, so could double as a light source in an energy crisis.
Now, I may have had a go on one or two other sex toys, and compared to similar products that lovingly recreate oral sex, the F1S V2 looks promising.
It’s not a stroker – you don’t move it up and down your meat, like the Arcwave Ion with its 'Pleasure Air' wanking tech, or a Blowmotion masturbator. It’s not doing anything radically different – reader, you put your dick in it – but the idea is that it does all the work, so you can give your wrists a rest and let the internal motors rock your boat.
At the open end, there’s no crude simulacrum of plump, parted lips; simply a wide entrance that narrows into a tunnel – the mouth and throat, if you will. The entire interior is soft, ribbed silicone, all gentle hillocks and enticing crevices promising to move in an organic way that massages your wang as if you’ve just presented it with a diamond ring.
Before you roll up your sleeves and become a sleeve to the rhythm, you turn your wank sleeve on.
You’ll need plentiful amounts of your preferred lube (I've chuck some of my favourites below). But seriously, be generous.
The F1S V2 is not roomy. For a realistic feel, the brand has kept it tight, and you’ll want luxuriant lashings of lubrication to park that Big Mack Truck right in this little garage.
Hit the power button and the lights on the top come on. The more power you add by pressing the + button, the more lights go on, so you can gauge just how powerful you want it.
Once you have confirmed consent, you can treat it like it’s the miners and you’re Maggie Thatcher, but beware of the great responsibility that comes with great power.
LELO has given this petite bombshell major motors, and it’s not messing about. If you're more of a Debbie Does Damage than a Debbie Does Dallas kind of man, pump up the jam, my friend. But for most of us, going all the way, power-wise, will not be necessary.
Speaking of going all the way: you will, but your schlong maybe won’t. If you’re on the top end of average length, you might find it doesn’t take all of you. Just like the human mouths, it’s simulating, there are limits, but it’s designed to work all the key areas and it doesn’t really affect the, ahem, outcome.
Once you’re in, you’re in. Slick and snug, the first thing you’ll notice is the noise. A discreet, sly tool for late-night entertainment in a slumbering household this is not.
The vibrations are powerful and the sound is loud. Add to that the squelching of a tight silicone sleeve hugging an oiled-up dong and you have yourself a full Greek chorus proclaiming that you, sir, are WANKING!
But assuming you’re home alone or someone in the house is hoovering, you’ll soon be distracted by… what’s this? The soft, wet movements of a smooth sleeve with small mechanised parts moving under its surface to push, pat, caress and generally work over your beanstalk with a masseur’s adroitness and a steady, rhythmic flow.
At this point, I should say that you can use the F1S V2 in two very different ways. There’s an app for everything, including high-end wank sleeves. You can, if you so desire, lunge enthusiastically into the dashboard-style controls that allow you to customise its movements and even track your performance feedback, monitoring speed, stamina and skill (?) to tailor your very own bespoke hand-shandy programs.
I generally just fancy a wank. So, as a man of simple pleasures, I cycled through the four in-built 'pleasure programs' until I found one that worked. You can go from mild to wild, and the app is easy to connect and intuitive to follow, but I found that the standard settings were more than enough to keep me entertained.
Ultimately, the F1S V2, with all its lofty claims of innovative technology and mind-bending, Nordic-engineered motor skills really just has one job. And yes, as they say in Sweden, with their charmingly over-correct English, I arrived.
On first use, it was a little cumbersome. Going through the various motions and figuring out the logistics can make it feel like homework, rather than a way to unwind.
Admittedly some of those settings do feel like you're getting a vigorous, sloppy seeing-to from someone who’s undoubtedly extremely enthusiastic but perhaps doesn’t actually like you very much.
I have had glowing, rapturous reviews of this pneumatic drill-like power from friends who tried the F1S V2. Also, incidentally, from card-carrying members of the fairer sex, enamoured of LELO’s powerful toys for women. But I found myself trying to find the settings that are somewhat quieter and less balls-to-the-wall ballistic.
After using it a few times with a (male) partner and then again on my own, the wank sleeve and I found our natural rhythm, and we’ve been firm friends with benefits ever since.
Coming in at a cool £199 (although right now you can save yourself £40), the F1S V2 isn’t cheap. Compared to similar products on the market though, it feels like the hefty price tag is justified, with a real-world usability and look-and-feel that make it stand apart from its peers.
It’s easy to set up and use once you’ve got to know each other, USB charges in 60 minutes for two hours’ use, and it's waterproof so easy to rinse out and clean.
It is noisy, which can be distracting, but it’s also powerful, which distracts you right back to what it’s doing.
If you like tech and are open to exploring and trying new things, this is pro-level sex tech for the man who has everything. Except, perhaps, a human person to blow him on demand.
Adam Kershaw is a writer, inexplicably-single ageing socialist, philanthropist and sexplorer, determined to set the record gay.
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